Forest Whitaker’s “Waiting to Exhale” is perhaps the quintessential “chick flick”—and an ideal case study for all that the cinematic subgenre can do. The “chick flick” often concerns heroines in the midst of personal transformation, and it’s capacious enough to enfold romantic comedies (“You’ve Got Mail”), tragedies (“The Notebook”), friendship fables (“Beaches”), and mother-daughter dramedies (“Terms of Endearment”). Its conventions are cosmic: the serendipitous, life-altering “meet-cute” is sometimes a literal collision, if not a metaphorical one, and chance encounters have a way of adding up. Well-placed songs provide relief; mood and weather mix, as in “Moonstruck.” “Exhale,” about four women friends who support one another through a series of interpersonal crises, fits in the matrilineal musing, the music, the camaraderie, the pathetic fallacy—when one character finally ends her sexual dry spell, rain falls in the desert. These movies show women exploring their options, taking steps to pursue goals and love connections. In Whitaker’s film, the protagonists are in different stages of nursing grief and developing new relationships. Because change is an act fraught with anxiety and confusion, the quartet spends the movie processing with one another, rhapsodizing, backsliding, and searching for moments to release—to let themselves breathe.
In February, New York’s Metrograph theatre hosted the Divorced Women’s Film Festival, screening “Waiting to Exhale” along with other cinematic depictions of dissolution, including “The Age of Innocence,” “The First Wives Club,” and “The War of the Roses.” Haley Mlotek, the program’s curator and the author of a book on the sociocultural impact of no-fault divorces, explained that the movies she chose “are classics not because they are reflections of life, exactly, but because they can be visions of our feelings.” Her selections center on women with emotional foresight who are also on the cusp of realizing what they truly want. As a divorced woman in her mid-thirties who was about to make a career pivot, I could relate to those characters in flux. I went to see “Waiting to Exhale” just after Valentine’s Day.
When “Exhale” premièred, thirty years ago today, I was six, and far too young to watch it, so I experienced it as a mystery of language and gesture and unspoken reference. Then, the film’s milieu was my mother’s: full of romantic crosstalk, long-distance phone calls, rueful rhythm and blues, and the kinds of brilliantly made-up faces I associated with Fashion Fair Cosmetics, where she was a counter manager. In the interim between her years as a thirtysomething and mine, the movie has existed as an artifact of the relatively edgy “it’s the” nineties, and, owing to its Grammy-winning, multiplatinum soundtrack, a hallmark in the history of tie-in marketing. Babyface, who produced the album and wrote or co-wrote all but one of its songs, did so after reading the screenplay; an intergenerational all-star cast of soul, R. & B., and pop acts like Houston, Aretha Franklin, Mary J. Blige, Chaka Khan, Brandy, and TLC, underscores the narrative.
Adapted from Terry McMillan’s best-selling 1992 novel of the same name, “Exhale” is equal parts “women’s picture,” a.k.a. weepie, Black women’s “chick flick,” and precursor to sitcoms like “Girlfriends” and “Insecure.” The film, which inaugurated a spate of adaptations of other McMillan novels, also marked a watershed moment in the representation of the Black professional class. The subject of talk-show chats, watch parties, and discussion dinners—organized and attended by the likes of Gayle King, no less—when it premièred, the film became as much a sociological phenomenon as an artistic one. In a 1995 story for the New York Times, the reporter Karen de Witt declared that “ ‘Waiting to Exhale,’ the movie, is rapidly proving to be ‘Waiting to Exhale,’ the event,” and quoted a woman who said, of the collective filmgoing experience, “This is our ‘Million Man March.’ ’’ As an adult, I’d rented and streamed the film alone; at Metrograph, I got to see it for the first time with other people.
“Exhale” begins with a radio d.j. chiding his listeners for being slow to determine their New Year’s resolutions. Then we hear the voices of four women making promises: to ignore her mother’s advice, to start a catering business, to “whip something” on an ex, to lose weight. The d.j. poses a question: “Do you know where you want to be tonight . . . and where do you want to be next year?” Savannah (Whitney Houston) is the first friend we see, driving along an empty highway, at precisely the moment she’s crossing state lines into Arizona. A voice-over imparts her inner monologue: “The deal is, the men in Denver are dead. No wonder I’m changing towns again. It’s gotta be better in Phoenix.” The desert vista stretches, its ochre sand shifting into a dissolve transition, and you can imagine Savannah as the lead in some kind of outlier Western: a drifter, she’s been shot down, bang-bang, but in Nancy Sinatra’s sense of the phrase. Chanté Moore’s “Wey U” plays on the radio, scoring a montage of the women’s physical and existential check-ins. We drop into their minds, too. Bernadine (Angela Bassett) is scattered, making a to-do list of all that needs to be done for her husband, John (Michael Beach), and their two young children. Robin (Lela Rochon) bemoans her attachment to the wrong men, while Gloria (Loretta Devine) sulks about missing quality time with her teen-age son, Tarik (Donald Adeosun Faison). The story follows the women over the course of a year, as they endure setbacks and entanglements of all sorts—but, ultimately, their romantic triumphs and disappointments are subordinate to the platonic bonds they share.
The film’s best-known set piece comes after John announces to Bernadine that he’s leaving her for his (white) bookkeeper, after she’d sacrificed her own dreams to help him with his company. Intent on payback, Bernadine strips all of his clothing from the closet and begins tossing them into his BMW, power-walking between the closet and the vehicle in just a robe and a negligee, carting each load of belongings in a child’s wagon. All the while, she recites a litany of domestic slights, revving herself up for the natural conclusion of this ugly expungement. Pantomiming John, she screams, “I need you to be the fuckin’ background to my foreground!” At the end of her soliloquy comes the coup de grâce: She strikes a match, lights a cigarette, and tosses a flame through the car’s sunroof, then observes the steaming pile of Italian suits and ties, a funeral pyre to an eleven-year marriage. She saunters off, leaving the fiery wreckage behind her. Whitaker’s blocking is sublime—it seals Bernadine’s shift from dutiful wife to a woman prioritizing her single self. When I watched that scene at Metrograph, the entire theatre clapped and cheered.
In a 2024 interview with Oprah Winfrey, Bassett said that the grandeur of that moment was inspired by her own mother. Over the decades, her interpretation of a woman scorned going scorched earth has found its way into the work of filmmakers such as Tyler Perry; unsurprisingly, it’s also become a meme. To my mind, this sequence initiated a new strain of American Kabuki theatre, one different from the dialled-up, campy performances of Bette Davis, in “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?” or Faye Dunaway, in “Mommie Dearest.” Bernadine’s strain of Black feminine righteous indignation and disappointment was also distinct from the often comical ferocity of the Blaxploitation heroine. It was less lyrical and more melodramatic than that of the women in Ntozake Shange’s choreopoem “for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf,” which was adapted for PBS’s “American Playhouse” program in 1982, after its Broadway run. Nor did it resemble the upper-class animus of Dominique Deveraux (played by the inimitable Diahann Carroll) on “Dynasty,” or the maternal dressing-downs by Phylicia Rashad’s Clair Huxtable on “The Cosby Show.”
What that “Waiting to Exhale” scene did differently was this: it presented vernacular anger on an operatic scale; it was “Porgy and Bess” at the multiplex. It treated rage as something to be reclaimed. Bassett transmits the surreal shock of learning that her vows were spoken on shaky ground—and makes over-the-top seem properly modulated. That bold, extravagant sensibility has shown up ever since, in such films as Emerald Fennell’s “Promising Young Woman,” Beyoncé’s visual album “Lemonade,” and music videos by Kelis, Taylor Swift, Summer Walker, and Lily Allen. There were lots of movies about female revenge in the nineties, from “Thelma & Louise” to “Set It Off” to “Eye for an Eye,” but none conveyed that wrath in a way that felt as febrile and visceral. The shot of Bassett’s smoldering walk from the barbecued Beemer represents a dashed decade of the character’s yuppie (Buppie) aspirations. It became a crucial image in a taxonomy of feminine fury.
But the grandiosity of “Waiting to Exhale” ’s most famous moment overwhelms the movie’s subtle introspection. It’s only occurred to me on recent viewings, including that screening in February, just how thoughtful it is, and how intent its makers are on staging their characters’ contemplation. A few weeks before the Divorce series, I saw Kathleen Collins’s film “Losing Ground,” from 1982. It could have been on Mlotek’s list; in fact, it offers a kind of skeleton key to understanding an underrated aspect of “Exhale” ’s legacy. “Losing Ground,” one of the first feature films directed by a Black woman, is a rom-com about the foibles and discoveries of Sara Rogers (Seret Scott), a Black philosophy professor studying religious ecstasy and “ecstatic experience” one summer in New York. It’s a scintillating season: when she’s not in the library, she flirts with a fellow-aesthete, tries her hand at acting, and considers reconciling with her smug painter husband. Following Collins’s lead, Whitaker, McMillan, and her co-screenwriter Ronald Bass dramatized a cohort of women seeking ecstatic experiences of their own. How to live is a topic of constant discussion, and these conversations are the catalyst for the inching progress they make by the story’s end. It’s no coincidence that the film is bookended by New Year’s Eve celebrations, which naturally invite reflection. The closing scene, in which the four embrace as fireworks go off, punctuates all of this onscreen thinking with external action to match. Along with “Losing Ground,” “Exhale” belongs to a subgenre of intelligent women’s pictures about transitions: John Berry’s “Claudine,” John Sayles’s “Lianna,” Pedro Almodóvar’s “Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown,” Barbra Streisand’s “The Mirror Has Two Faces.” For at least one movie patron in 1995—the woman who mentioned the Million Man March in her Times interview—going to see “Exhale” was a proxy for political gathering. In 2025, it’s a reminder that lots of revolutions have to start somewhere internal first.
The state border that Savannah crosses at the start of “Waiting to Exhale” is the first of many dividing lines: an either-or choice between old habits and new ones. There’s a weird chime between that opening sequence and Houston’s last days, after she’d wrapped filming a “Sparkle” remake in Detroit, in late 2011. Flying would have brought her home to her norm too soon, so she chose to travel by car back to Atlanta, in order to extend the good feeling of working on something creative. I wonder what Houston thought about during that long drive, and what she envisioned for herself. “Waiting to Exhale” was the second in a series of blockbusters she appeared in, which represent only a sampling of what she could have done. Her filmography is peppered with what-ifs, including an adaptation of Toni Morrison’s “Tar Baby,” which she was set to star in back in the eighties. Her death a few months after that ride home meant an adaptation of “Getting to Happy,” McMillan’s “Exhale” sequel, could not move forward. Midway through the original film, during Gloria’s birthday party, the women sit around smoking, listening to Franklin’s contribution to the soundtrack, “It Hurts Like Hell,” and questioning one another about heartbreak and art. There’s an ashtray of stubbed butts on the coffee table. “Why do they write these damn songs?” Savannah asks. “To make you think and believe and dream you could feel like this?” ♦




















