Kev QuirkModify

2025-10-18 21:36:00

After years of climbing the ladder in cyber, I’ve learned that sometimes the best move isn’t up. It’s stepping back to make life sustainable again.

The corporate ladder is less of a climb and more of a game of Snakes & Ladders. Moments of progress, setbacks, and the occasional lucky roll where everything just seems to align. Sometimes you go up, sometimes it’s a move sideways, and sometimes it’s a move down.

The climb never ends

In August 2024 I was offered a promotion at work that moved me from a “senior manager” position to an “executive” position. It came with all the cool perks one would think an exec-level role should come with; a nice corner office, a personal assistant, the kudos of being one of a few very senior people, and of course a salary to match.

I took the role, but the expectations of a senior manager versus an executive are very different. I work for an American company, so a lot of the people I work with are based across the US. That means lots of late evenings.

But I also have a team in Singapore, so that means early mornings too. Then there are my teams in the UK, Ireland, and India, so I’m busy during my core working hours as well.

Running a global team is hard enough, but add to that the fact that I work in the cyber security industry for a large American bank that’s a huge target. Shit gets busy.

Then layer on top of that regular travel to America, a young family at home, lots of pets to look after, and a disabled brother who my mum and I both care for. It’s a lot.

Re-framing success

When I took the role, I had a feeling that this promotion might be a step too far. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I had to give it a try to see if I could do it. I’m one of only two executives within the cyber team where I’m based, the other being nearly 20 years my senior. This was a huge mark of success for me, and I was incredibly proud of what I’d achieved.

But as time went on and I spent more time at my desk and less time with my loved ones, it became clear that I needed to re-frame my measure of success. Plus, I was burning out.

I vividly remember the moment it clicked that I was messing things up. I’d had a string of particularly late evenings working on a project we’d been running for a few months. It was a Thursday evening, and I signed off around 9pm. On a Thursday, my kids have swimming practice and it’s usually a late night for them. They got home at around the same time I signed off, and my youngest came up to me, gave me a big hug and told me he’d missed me.

I didn’t understand. I asked why he’d missed me when I hadn’t been anywhere. He said:

Yeah you have. You’ve been in America again, haven’t you?

I hadn’t been in America. I’d just been working such long hours that I hadn’t seen the kids for four days.

It wasn’t a dramatic “breakdown” moment, just a calm clarity. The realisation that being present with my loved ones matters more than being important.

Stepping down, not away

So I decided that the exec role wasn’t for me and it was time to step back to a senior manager position with a smaller scope, less stress, and most importantly, more balance. This wasn’t a failure or a retreat, but a deliberate move toward sustainability.

I set up some time with my manager and broke the news to her. She told me she understood my decision, that I’d clearly put a lot of thought into it, and she was happy to support my stepping down.

We agreed that she would speak with HR and make the arrangements so I could transition out of the role while supporting whoever took over from me. We estimated six months for this process to happen.

But then my sister took her own life and everything was turned upside down. While off on bereavement leave, I caught up with my manager and explained that I needed to take a step back ASAP because I didn’t have the capacity to carry on with the exec role.

She was a few steps ahead of me and had already arranged cover so I could step down. A week later, I did.

I’ve never felt so supported by any employer I’ve ever had. Anyone who’s worked for a large enterprise will know that things move glacially slow, so for my manager to get this squared away in a couple of weeks felt like she’d moved mountains for me.

That right there is the kinda shit that makes me want to work somewhere for the rest of my career. The pay, the benefits, the corner office — it’s all just bullshit and noise. The work is important, but the humans are what matter most.

Redefining what winning looks like

Sometimes sliding down a rung is exactly what keeps you in the game. I’d much rather be in the game, albeit having slid down a snake, than be up another rung of the ladder; overworked, miserable, stressed, burned out.

As a result of all this, I’ve realised that success isn’t just about upward motion. It’s about endurance, purpose, and perspective. It’s about being content in the work we do. Being challenged but not overworked. And most importantly, being in a position to spend time with loved ones.

Because let’s be honest, people: no one ever lay on their deathbed and thought “I wish I’d joined that meeting at 9pm.” But I’m sure plenty of people have laid there thinking “I wish I’d spent more time with my wife and kids…” I refuse to be that person.

So I’m now back to being a senior manager and proud to be doing the work I do. More importantly though, I’m still in the game, just playing it on my own terms.

2025-10-16 19:45:00

I've seen this doing the rounds on a few blogs recently, so wanted to add my own version because I'm a narcissist. 🙃

Pete Moore did his version yesterday, and David did his version all the way back in April. I actually had this in draft from around then, but never got around to finishing it (there’s always something more fun to write).

Well, I don’t have anything more fun to write at the moment, so Pete’s post prompted me to get it done. So here’s Ten Pointless Facts About Me…

Do you floss your teeth?

Kinda. A pet hate of mine is having food stuck in my teeth. So I always clean them out with a toothpick every time I eat. 🤢

Tea, coffee, or water?

All 3. I mostly drink water and coffee, but do enjoy a cup of tea with breakfast at the weekend.

Footwear preference?

Crocs! I love Crocs! But I don’t wear them outdoors - they’re more like comfy slippers for around the house for me. When I’m out of the house, it’s usually trainers or walking shoes. Usually the latter as I’ll take comfort over fashion any day. My personal favourites are Merrell and Columbia.

Favourite dessert?

Anything lemon flavoured. Usually lemon drizzle, or lemon cheesecake (not the America kind though 🇬🇧).

The first thing you do when you wake up?

I always have a pint of water next to the bed. So the first thing I always do is to take a drink to freshen my mouth, then go to the bathroom to get rid of the water I drank the night before.

Age you’d like to stick at?

Probably 28…ish. I think late 20s is a good balance between health, disposable income, and level of responsibility.

How many hats do you own?

I actually don’t know. 8 maybe? I have a few winter hats, a cap, some summer hats, and my old beret from when I was in the Army.

Describe the last photo you took?

A photo of one of the watches that I’m selling. I don’t take a lot of photos really. When I do, they’re mostly of my pets, my kids, or my motorbikes.

Worst TV show?

No idea. I have a pretty low bar when it comes to TV and movies. I can usually find something I enjoy in pretty much everything I watch. The worst movie I’ve watched though was Dog Man; absolute steaming pile of dog shit (pun intended). 💩

As a child, what was your aspiration for adulthood?

I didn’t have any serious aspirations to be honest. I was too busy being a child to worry about adult stuff. I did want to be a doctor for a while, but then I realised that I don’t like blood, and that I’m not clever enough.

That’s it

And that’s it, those are the Ten Pointless Facts About Me. Maybe you found it interesting and learned something about me?

If you want to take part, here’s the questions in a copy/paste format to dump into your own blog post…

• Do you floss your teeth?
• Tea, coffee, or water?
• Footwear preference?
• Favourite dessert?
• The first thing you do when you wake up?
• Age you’d like to stick at?
• How many hats do you own?
• Describe the last photo you took?
• Worst TV show?
• As a child, what was your aspiration for adulthood?

2025-10-14 18:34:00

I have too many watches in my collection, so I'm trying to reduce it down to around 24 watches. As a result, many of them are for sale if you're interested.

I think it’s time to drastically reduce my watch collection. You see, as I started getting into watches, I bought everything I came across that piqued my interest. But now I’m a few years into this hobby, I have a much better idea of what I really like to wear on my wrist.

Fact is, I only wear around half of my collection on a regular basis. Many of my watches have never worn, or only worn once or twice. So they’re mostly brand new, and frankly, a waste.

So I figured instead of dumping them all on eBay, I’d list them here to give you fine people first refusal. Here’s how it will work:

1. You take a look at what’s for sale and if anything floats your boat, use the email me button to make an offer. Please make sure you fill in the offer amount and your country so I can calculate postage.
2. I’ll review the offer, calculate postage and will come back to you with a full price (inc. postage), or a counter offer.
3. If we’re both happy, you send me the money via PayPal and I’ll ship the little ticker out to its new home.

This will be a first come, first served process and as the watches sell, I’ll remove them from the list.

So please, take a look and if you’re interested, make me an offer. I’m planning to donate all proceeds of these sales to a local mental health charity, Open Door in memory of my sister, Lisa.

⌚ View My Watches for Sale

2025-10-12 20:15:00

I was reading The Internet Phonebook last night and a comment in the prologue stood out to me about the term 'like, share and subscribe'.

The Internet Phonebook is a fantastic read for anyone who spends time online, or doing this blogging thing. Or if you’re considering starting a blog, it’s a great way to learn the many benefits of doing so.

Anyway, I digress. While reading my copy last night, a quote in the prologue stood out to me:

The internet I discovered had fewer abstract words. Less “attention”, “competition”, “promotion”, “action”, and “solution”. Instead, there were words like “home”, “love”, “shadow”, “glow”, “fly”, and “ladybug”. Shorter and softer words, but also mysterious and wondrous. Words that rarely asked me to share, like and subscribe, but which sparked curiosity like a trail of signs through the Black Forest.

I love this quote as I think it epitomises the difference between the likes of influencers, content creators, & YouTubers and us bloggers.

Put simply, the former, I think, are chasing growth, while the latter just want to share their thoughts and ideas with the world. For me, that’s a far more attractive proposition as it encourages dialogue, conversation, and friendship.

I’d much rather chat with someone about a post they wrote than be one of a thousand commenters under a YouTube video or Instagram post where the creator seems more interested in their sponsor than the discussion below.

But maybe I’m weird, as my ilk and I are in the minority, I think. 🤷🏻‍♂️

What do you think?

2025-10-10 20:43:00

I think this is a great move by the Mastodon team - so many instances are supported by their members through donations. As I understand it, a large part of Mastodon’s funding comes from donations and sponsors too.

By diversifying their income streams, we will hopefully see Mastodon here for the long-term, and (more importantly) not selling out to big tech as they will be able to stand on their own two feet.

…Mozilla, take note. You sausages.

2025-10-10 03:18:00

I’ve had my email published on this site for around 4 years at this point, and when I set it up, I decided to use plus addressing so I could easily switch addresses when the inevitable spam came.

But it never came.

And now, 4 years on, I’m still using the original email address I published back in 2021 with no additional spam seen.

I always wondered why this was the case; I mean my email is out there for everyone to see. Then I read this post by Luke and it all (depressingly) clicked into place. I’ve considered adding a contact form to this site again, but having read this post, and my lived experience, I don’t think I’ll bother.