2026-04-25 09:20:00
I've marveled lately at the active surrendering of cognition to AI that I've witnessed.
I watched a guy at work use ChatGPT to draft a four-sentence letter for a customer. I said "that's ridiculous, man" and he said "it just helps me sound better" which didn't make it less ridiculous to me. He's fully capable of drafting that letter on his own in just a couple minutes if he wanted to. It would have sounded perfectly fine. I've seen him perform similar tasks, and I'm 100% certain he could have done it. But instead, he let AI do it for him because it was faster and easier. There wasn't any rush. He just didn't want to do the thinking.
The same guy was paying for a monthly subscription to ChatGPT for a while (canceled it now, though), and has used it to tell him if his outfit looked good. 'Cause who cares what he thinks of his outfit, right? Better get AI to give him an "opinion" so he knows he doesn't look like a fool. It genuinely blows my mind. I don't care what another person thinks of my outfit, let alone a fucking AI model.
I get angry about this sort of thing. Part of that anger has to do with the environmental disregard, and the lack of empathy for communities already impacted by data center pollution. But I think it's also a fear response. I get mad because the world I see developing in front of me is scary. It could still be stopped. We don't have to forfeit our minds to the computers. I know AI isn't going anywhere, but we don't have to surrender the very thing that makes us human to it either. AI isn't capable of cognition. It has superior computing power, and has been trained on far more expansive materials. But we are the dominant beings. Will we always be, though? Or are we staring down the barrel of a bad sci-fi movie where all the main characters make the dumbest fucking decisions and sacrifice our species in the process?
We'll have to protect our daughter from AI proliferation and cognitive surrender. Her generation is the first to grow up without knowing a world before AI was in everything. It scares me that we might not be able to protect her—that pressure from the world around her when she's not safe in my arms might overpower our parenting. But I suppose all I can do is my damndest. As with everything, I think, it starts with the example.
I laugh or shake my head sometimes at the old folks who are so resistant to well-established technology like debit cards, online banking, and email. That's probably going to be me some day when it comes to AI. But at least I won't be one who surrendered my mind to it.
2026-04-25 05:37:56
I am simply and passionately Done with people telling other people that what they do to survive is unethical.
The argument is always based in "alternatives" that not everyone has.
"Just eat plant-based foods:" because those are freely and cheaply available everywhere? Because grain, fruit, and vegetable farming isn't exploitative of sentient beings or the environment? Because you can overcome your allergies and aversions if you care enough about cows?
"Just get a better job:" because jobs that pay a living wage are just lying around for the taking? Because being trafficked is a choice? Because things like "eating" and "not dying of exposure" can wait until you convince someone to pay you for something you're not ashamed to do?
"Just don't give money to--" yeah, okay, sure. A handful of vast conglomerates own everything on earth. Even if you can live naked in a field eating nothing but organic native grasses (which, more power to you), you're still going to have to pay taxes to a corrupt government.
"No ethical consumption under capitalism" isn't an excuse. It's a fact. Everyone alive on this planet has to make moral compromises in order to live at all. Yes, some of those compromises are more defensible than others. That doesn't mean you get to tell strangers on the internet that they're bad people because they want to survive in a shitty world.
Am I saying you can't talk shit about internet strangers at all? Of course not. Things that are not crucial to anyone's survival include but are not limited to: inflicting pain for shits and giggles! Getting ChatGPT to write your term papers! Calling abuse survivors liars! Shitting in someone's Cheerios! Driving 90mph on a one-lane road at 3 am! Playing your music so loudly that the neighbor's house shakes! Arbitrarily declaring people subhuman based on their physical characteristics! Making your child feel bad about their weight! Travelling around the world for the sole purpose of killing large animals so you can prove your dominance! Wearing your underpants on your head! Cheering for someone's death! Leaving the toilet seat up! There are any number of reasons -- valid, invalid, profound, petty -- to criticize other people's behavior.
But "they're doing whatever they have to in order to live any kind of life" is not on the list.
2026-04-25 00:20:00
This one may be a controversial one, but I'm writing it anyway.
You've heard the saying "rules are meant to be broken", for the most part I agree. Some "rules" are basically just common sense, or what should be common sense: don't dive on the shallow end of the pool, don't light a match near a gas tank, clip your nails before entry, stuff like that.
However some rules are just... stupid. Pointless even. Existing only for the sake of seemingly keeping people in line. This is done either socially or legally. Many self-imposed rules exist simply because they have "always been done that way". Many legal rules aren't even enforceable.
Little acts of defiance in the face of the authority that insists upon its own legitimacy go a long way for when it comes time to do something for the greater good. The civil rights movement was built upon breaking laws, black people sitting in a whites-only restaurant was illegal. Breaking the small stuff makes it easier for when it comes time to break the big stuff.
You also start to exercise why certain rules became rules, like the aforementioned don't dive head-first into the shallow end of the pool. The rule is in-place for your safety, but the rule isn't enforceable. It just becomes a guideline or boundary.
Another byproduct of breaking small arbitrary rules is it becomes easier to not fall victim into herd mentality. You've basically trained that "muscle" in your brain to ignore the scoffs and the social anxiety. You begin to recognize your own autonomy as a person.
You may also spark within someone that confidence to follow suit and maybe start questioning what is just social conditioning vs something actually meant for personal/social safety.
"In order to liberate others, one must liberate themselves", as the saying goes.
I really can't answer this for you. It's up to you and understanding your own agency in deciding what personal social/legal rules you want to break.
But a simple starting-out rule that I often tell people they can break first is social/work-related ones. Low stakes. Here's some examples:
When someone asks you "how are you doing?", don't default to "good, you?". Be a bit more open, doesn't have to give deep details, you can just say something like "Honestly, pretty tired." or "pretty great, got a little love note from my wife this morning with breakfast while I was heading out the door" (this one I used recently). You can also make some joke to break the monotony, I like saying "Awake and not crying" which often gets a chuckle.
Wear pajamas when going to the grocery store or alternatively overdress when going to the grocery store. We often always say we'll wear X fancy thing on a special occasion. You're alive, that is a special occasion, wear that dress.
Be honest without being a dick when someone asks for your opinion. Work on shedding that fear of expressing your opinion. If you're in school, raise your hand to answer questions if you otherwise don't out of fear of looking "stupid", you're in school you're all relatively stupid. If you feel the urge to be productive, fight that urge and try to give yourself a break, you don't need to productive at all times. For men, do/wear something that someone else might call "gay" or "feminine". So on and so on.
I can go on listing a bunch of examples, but then this blog would be a fucking novel. This is just a way to spark ideas for what is supposed to act as a sort of "gateway drug" to the "harder stuff"
Now you're breaking real rules. Yesterday's telling someone you don't feel like going to some gathering instead of trying to make up an excuse, is today's jaywalking.
Now for the harder stuff. These ones might take a bit more courage to do.
For me, it's been at my train stations. For context, there's platforms you stand at to board the train, and a ramp that leads to a walkway that you're supposed to use to cross to the other platforms. I started just jumping down and jumping back up onto the platform, completely skipping the long walk around down the ramp. I'm physically capable of doing so, the rails aren't electrified, and the train doesn't move nearly fast enough to catch me by surprise (it barely goes above 20mph when approaching a station).
Another example is Jaywalking. If there is literally no cars anywhere in sight, just walk across. People will often follow with you to my surprise. Some might not, some might give you an odd look. Good. You're doing multiple things, stress testing your reflex to obey, as well as combatting that peer pressure. For me, it's also one small act of defying the car-centric society and infrastructure we've built.
You have to be aware of your surroundings with these ones. Be aware of any potential immediate threats, cars, trains, bikes, cops. The idea is to stress test, not land yourself with a medical bill or a ticket.
After seeing a video of traffic in the Netherlands where people were walking, biking, and driving without any form of stop sign/light in sight. I obviously wouldn't jump down if there was an active train coming (look both ways and all that). I started questioning "what's stopping us from doing this for ourselves?
There's also dealing with confrontation. Telling some pervert harassing someone to pound sand for example. Or putting a racist in his place. An example that I think about often is this time my wife and I were on a bus waiting to get back to the cruise ship while on a stop in Mexico. There was this couple, a Thai woman I had a conversation with and this dollar store Henry Winkler looking motherfucker she unfortunately calls a husband. In the front of the bus came this group of Chinese women who were talking amongst themselves in Mandarin. Well, old coot decided to start loudly shouting that stereotypical "bing bong ching chong" shit that racists do to make fun of Asian people. Made my fucking blood boil, but I did nothing in that moment out of the likelihood of escalation. I'm not afraid of confrontation. I've worked in retail and have told customers in no uncertain terms to kiss my ass, but in the moment I didn't. Maybe had my wife not been there, who is far more anxious about confrontation than me, I would have. Anyway, He eventually stopped when his wife got him to stop being an asshole for a second, but I regret not saying something. Never again.
Do what you feel you feasibly can safely. Commit time theft at work, tag a political message in a bathroom stall with sharpie (I mean in areas like a 7-11 or some franchise, not a small coffee shop), pirate from greedy corporations, etc., etc.
All this to essentially be said, exercise your personal autonomy and practice sticking up for yourself/others and practice defiance in the face of oppressive systems.
This is just one aspect of proper social change, but a very important one. Ruthlessly question the legitimacy of a social/institutional rule, and if it ends up making no sense and if you feel safe enough doing so to push yourself out of your comfort zone, then do it.
If you read all this, congratulations. You just got tricked into reading a little bit about Anarchist calisthenics. If you want a little more information, I'll share this link. Even if you don't consider yourself an anarchist, it's still a useful tool because one day protests aren't going to be these neat little government-sanctioned marches on a Saturday. With that, I'll leave you with this little quote:
“One day you will be called on to break a big law in the name of justice and rationality. Everything will depend on it. You have to be ready. How are you going to prepare for that day when it really matters? You have to stay ‘in shape’ so that when the big day comes you will be ready. What you need is ‘anarchist calisthenics.’ Every day or so break some trivial law that makes no sense, even if it’s only jaywalking. Use your own head to judge whether a law is just or reasonable. That way, you’ll keep trim; and when the big day comes, you’ll be ready.” —James C. Scott, Two Cheers For Anarchism
Previous |
Reply via email: [email protected]
Ready for the weekend. Just wanna spend time with my family. Been making good progress on Blood Meridian finally now that I'm taking a train to commute to work. I read about 1-2 chapters each day, and when I finish a chapter I'll often just stare out the window at the view. I tried seeing if I could use my skateboard to make my walk from car-to-station-to-work faster, and about ate shit so I'm gonna have to practice (and maybe get some better wheels). Also been working on a Windows XP gaming rig which has been fun, got that aquarium screensaver going.
2026-04-24 23:38:00
Once again, shame on me for forgetting where I first found this post:
The BIC Pen Experiment, Part 3 | The Tinkering Dwarf
I know it's on Bubbles but I am fairly certain I saw it on someone else's round-up. Maybe Joel?
Anyway the gist of the experiment was to see how long it would take to use up the ink well in a classic BIC cristal pen. It's one of my favourite reliable pens and I don't think I'm alone in that matter. It writes well and is smooth - what more do you want from a cheap ballpoint?
I have a vast collection of pens at my disposal, and in the interest of actually using all of them, I switch between pens week-to-week. Upon reading this experiment I decided to grab my BIC Cristal ReNew from my locker at work on Monday and have committed to using it up1.
As of Monday it was about half-full, and as I type today, it's not far from the same spot. I don't write as much on weekends so it may take a while to empty it.
This is a neat, slick-looking pen that is re-loadable! I have another ink well in my locker and if I so-chose I could put in a blue ink well from another pen. But for this time I'm just using up this ink well, I'm not going to use up both.↩
2026-04-24 23:14:00
I quit Instagram in October 2025.
It’s been a weird and winding road getting here (and honestly the last six months have been weird to begin with, a story for another day), but I finally feel like I’ve found a virtual home.
When I quit Insta and Booksta, I had the best intentions. The plan was to go all in on my Ghost site, tell my friends on Instagram that I’d be writing my book reviews over there and they can get them right in their email inbox. It was great.
Until it wasn’t.
It was quite lonely, actually. Ghost didn’t have great discoverability, though I know they’re working on it. Me and my 8 subscribers against the world.
In November, money got tight. So paying for Ghost was unfortunately out of the question. I began looking for alternatives, not really sure what I was looking for (except that it had to be free, because every penny counted).
Seeing how easy discoverability was on Substack, I was sold. I announced that I was moving, pulled my little list over to Substack, and started building what I thought would be my new home there.
There’s something… addictive about Substack, though. I was spending a lot of time on the app, but I wasn’t writing. I was scrolling Notes, subscribing and following tons of new people (who I eventually had to unsubscribe from, because the number of emails I was getting was ridiculous). I was getting the same dopamine hits that I was trying to escape from on Instagram.
I was also inundated with messaging that encouraged me to “monetize”, to scale, to grow my newsletter. There are so many great writers over there and the pressure to write something AMAZING that also got you paid subscribers and picked up on Notes was just… a lot. I often didn’t write at all because it didn’t feel like I had anything important to contribute. Nothing important enough to get someone to pay me. Imposter syndrome followed me like a shadow.
It was around January or February 2026 when I found Bear.
And it feels like coming up for air, honestly. I’m aging myself here, but I remember early internet days fiddling with html and css on chat forums like InvisionFree, MyBB, Myspace and Neopets. 20+ years ago, the internet was like the wild west. And that’s the vibe I get from Bear and the blogs around here. Little virtual playgrounds where you can just do what you want and really make it your own. I’m hearing a ton about Indie Web lately and I’m ready to fully step into it.
So, here I am. I pulled over a few of my favorite pieces of recent writing and now I’m on to new stuff.
Bye, Substack. Hello, Bear. Thanks for giving me a place to land.
2026-04-24 21:30:00
Recently, while scrolling through pictures that I took on my phone last year, this one caught my eye.
I photographed this at some kind of design exhibition. I don't remember the topic anymore, or how this exhibit tied into the exhibition as a whole. However, both back then and now, when looking at the picture again, I found this arrangement of objects to be attractive somehow ... even though the individual elements aren't. The iPhone is worn around the edges, without a protective case. The book is battered and broken (the spine has been fixed with tape). The drawings in the notebook are crude, drawn with a cheap ballpoint pen. The mug looks like it belongs in a dingy 80s coffee shop.
Aside from the iPhone, the ensemble looks very retro. That is definitely part of its appeal to me. But that's not all there is to it. More so than the retro-nostalgia element, what appeals to me is the frankness with which these things are presented.
I don't know who these items belong to (or if they even belong to one specific person at all). However, they still evoke an image: The image of a person who is a bit messy, but tends to keep things simple. Someone who doesn't care too much if their iPhone gets scratches or their book becomes worn down. They probably know that their drawings aren't very good, but it's not really the quality they're concerned with, anyway. The drawings are just vehicles for working out something else. And to get there, they'll use their tools extensively, without worrying about appearances. It's a kind of messy chic, a form of contemporary, casual wabi-sabi. It gets its appeal from the implication that the person using these tools is a maker who focuses on action and the process of doing something and doesn't overthink too much. The "just do it" attitude.
To someone who always wants to keep their notes clean and puts covers on their books and notebooks, this is very appealing. It's an "opposites attract" kind of situation: Because I'm the type of person who wants every page of the notebook to "look good" and gets bummed out when they "ruin a page" with a bad drawing, I admire people who can just put something on the page and move on. I think I often end up holding myself back, limiting my options and potential, because I care about form and doing things properly so much. If I spent more time trying, failing, and learning while doing, I'd probably get to where I want to be faster.
So in a way, this photo serves as a reminder to myself to focus more on action and process. To treat my tools a bit more roughly - not in a "move fast and break things" kind of way, but just a bit more worry-free. They're tools, they're meant to be used, not pampered. Yes, my notebooks and pens might get scratches, I'll make mistakes, and create a lot of bad drawings. But if that gets me where I want to go, it'll be worth it, and the traces left on the tools will let them develop their very own charm over time. It's not just old, kintsugi'd tea cups and antique wooden furniture that can embody beauty in imperfection. Beat-up pens or messy notebooks can, too.