2026-11-11 04:56:09
I’m on a slow background mission to reverse the othering in my worldview. De-othering: sive.rs/deothering
2026-11-10 08:00:00
The word “other” is also a verb. To other is to treat groups of people as fundamentally different or inferior.
It’s in our nature, but leaders amplify it for scare-mongering. Those immigrants. Those Muslims. Those Chinese. They’re the problem. They’re not like us.
That message is broadcast and echoes all around you, which intensifies feeling it’s a fact.
It builds a huge wall: us versus them. It repels you from that wall, to make sure you can’t see them, because that would complicate the simplicity of polarizing.
We categorize the animal world into species. Species are so different that they can’t mate, can’t switch, can’t be both a cat and a bird. The problem with othering is thinking of people as so deeply different that they are like a separate species.
It’s an enticing belief because it helps you jump to a conclusion, so you can stop thinking. Those people are just weird and bad, and that’s that.
I’m so interested in othering, because I noticed it in myself. I grew up with the usual stereotypes that shaped my worldview. Then I moved to the city, where you meet people from the other side of that wall.
Like a great story where the heroes oppose an evil enemy tribe, but then one person falls into enemy hands and realizes that tribe is not evil and is not the enemy, and you get the wow moment of understanding a conflicting point of view. Stories tend to make only two sides, so they can take sides and switch sides. But imagine a longer story that does this twenty times, so you can’t even think of them as sides anymore. That’s what I’m trying to do with my life.
I’m on a slow background mission to reverse the othering in my worldview. It’s a fun challenge.
When I notice I’m othering, I undo my conclusions, and cross that wall. Understand and internalize a conflicting point of view. I try to join every tribe, to show myself we are not separate species.
This year, I heard the word “other” as a verb, and it called all of this to mind. So now I can give my mission a succinct term: de-othering.
2026-11-10 04:44:49
Fascinating book “I Deliver Parcels in Beijing”. First you learn what it's like to do the no-skill jobs in China, but near the end it takes a twist as he quits to become an insightful writer. My notes: sive.rs/book/BeijingParcels
2026-11-09 04:32:32
Explorer? Being lost makes you fully present? The mystery of distance. Desire cherished instead of satisfied. Similar thoughts in this book: sive.rs/book/GettingLost
2026-11-09 04:14:50
Interesting business book 'Alchemy' by Rory Sutherland about ideas that don't make sense in theory but work in practice: sive.rs/book/Alchemy
2026-11-03 08:00:00
At first, it’s interesting autobiographical accounts by a man in China with low-status odd jobs. You learn what it's like to be a warehouse packer or delivery guy. Then near the end of the book he gets burnt-out, takes a two year break to stay at his parents house being a full-time writer, and you realize of course his stories are only shared here because he took the months to write them. But then he also shares a brilliant analysis of what makes rock music great, and says things like “as the German philosopher Gotthold Ephraim Lessing said”, so you find he’s actually a really thoughtful insightful guy that has his philosophical reasons for choosing simple manual jobs. Really surprisingly interesting book.
The customer is king? But there should only be one king. I have to serve hundreds every day.
I watched my classmates change almost the moment they left. The gap between them and me only widened with time, our differences setting deeper in us. Meanwhile, this seemingly natural transformation continued to elude me. How they went from students to full-blown grown-ups just like that was a mystery. Had there been an adult version of them hidden inside their adolescent selves all along? They only needed to shed their student skins and the metamorphosis was complete.
When disgruntled, the lowly among us only have each other to pick on, because going after the powerful will only cost us.
Love is blind, people like to say. But if you ask me, love sees clearest of all. It is the least interested in personal gain, and the most true to itself. What’s blind is hatred.
My earliest writings were just pale imitations of Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye.
The more literary works I read, the more distant I felt from my reality.
This book required none of the effort of invention, I just put down things as they were.
A distinctive characteristic of “rock as art form” is that its success depends heavily and directly on the artist having a unique spirit and personality. Rock’s charm comes from the synergy between artist and music: the artist’s soul (the content) and the music (the form). It is why true rock musicians are repelled by music that is elegant, refined, and skillful but lacks soul. The best rock isn’t necessarily the most moving song, most beautiful voice, or virtuoso performance; it’s about the opposite extreme: relishing the simple, the impulsive, and the rough around the edges, unique and insightful. Performance is the art form of presentation. The most standout personality, interrogating the soul, becoming ever more sensitive and radical, sustaining their artistic vitality and originality. They seek unique expressions for even the most insignificant parts of themselves. The artist crying out as they descend into the abyss.
Consumerism is lifelong imprisonment, which only gives the appearance of freedom.
They knew very little about my past, and I very little about theirs, and no one had any interest in prying.
Selflessness might be a noble virtue, but it isn’t fundamental to being human.
The landlord at my new place was an elderly Bai woman who couldn’t speak Mandarin but really enjoyed chatting. She wouldn’t let me go without a quick tongue wag whenever she saw me. Yet, in the year-plus that I knew her, I didn’t understand a single sentence she said. I just smiled at whatever came out of her mouth. She talked, I smiled, and it would eventually make her laugh.
People’s mindsets are complex, even polyphonic. There can be multiple melodies all playing over the top of each other.
Some remarkable individuals never let their considerable knowledge weigh them down. They navigate through it like seasoned sailors negotiating hidden reefs, mapping principles in their minds so as to never have one unexpectedly interfere with the simple joys of life.
And as the German philosopher Gotthold Ephraim Lessing said, the pursuit of truth is more valuable than its possession. The same goes for freedom: The pursuit is more precious than the attainment.
If we see no value in the work we do, beyond a means to make ends meet, then we are dooming ourselves to a bleak psychological landscape.
