2026-04-24 02:53:46
It's a tough situation for Drew. While he has dialed up his football fandom to super-sicko levels (complimentary) in recent years, my interest in the sport has remained stubbornly around average. When we discussed having an NFL Draft-focused episode of The Distraction, we were politely avoiding talking about the fact that I can't go nearly as deep on the subject of sleeper mid-round edge rusher values. Thankfully, we hit upon a compromise that worked for all of us: having the legendary Aaron Schatz, now of the sports analytics site FTN and the founder of Football Outsiders, as a guest, then spending half the episode talking about how awful online media is. Something for everyone!
Aaron had a lot to say about his (highly negative) experience with the venture capitalists who bought and ultimately killed Football Outsiders, which Mike Tanier wrote about for us a couple years ago, and which finally wound down once those owners just straight-up stopped paying anyone. That URL, which once contained nearly decades of football analysis, from writers who became stars in their field and also in pro teams' front offices, is now a dead link.
2026-04-24 01:44:21
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday at Defector during the NFL season. Got something you wanna contribute? Email the Roo. You can also read Drew over at SFGATE, and buy Drew’s books while you’re at it.
The NFL Draft starts tonight in Pittsburgh, and no one gives a shit. Occupancy rates at both hotels and Airbnbs in the Steel City are falling woefully short of initial projections. Fans who live in other cities are uninterested in paying up to four figures for a single hotel room, and locals aren’t exactly pleased that their public school system was compelled to switch to remote learning for three full days this week just to accommodate the event. The hype for this weekend is at such a low ebb that Fernando Mendoza, tonight’s No. 1 overall pick, has decided not to attend. This draft is deader than your love life, and everyone knows it.
This shouldn’t be the case. Even with a draft class that’s unremarkable by nearly everyone’s standards, the streets of Pittsburgh should still be teeming with drunken yinzers and myriad Jets fans who made the drive just so that they could boo the selection of Arvell Reese in person. Hell, I should be at the draft right now, rocking my Kevin Williams jersey and keeping my eyes open with broken toothpicks so I can stay awake to see the No. 18 pick announced live. Then I could fall asleep in my hotel room and wake up the next morning to enjoy a traditional Pittsburgh breakfast of a scrappleburger with two McGriddles for its bun.
2026-04-24 00:45:27
PHILADELPHIA — On the afternoon of April 9, 2026, partisans of the Alberta separatist movement—who rally for the landlocked province’s secession from the broader, united commonwealth of Canada, and the establishment of a self-sufficient petrostate bankrolled by its ample oil, gas and mineral reserves—scored a major endorsement.
“I officially RECOGNIZE the NEW INDEPENDENT NATION of ALBERTA,” the comedian, actor, and adult Catholic convert Rob Schneider posted on Twitter, “and its separation from the People’s Republic Of Canada and the socialist morons in Ottawa.” That’s right. Renegades and heretics of the Wild Rose Province, take heart: Deuce Bigalow, the male gigolo, has your back. This foray into the crankiest corners of Canadian politics might seem a little odd—if you haven’t been paying attention.
Rob Schneider is probably still best known for his five-year stint as a cast member on Saturday Night Live in the early ‘90s. He was part of a cohort of young comics (Adam Sandler, David Spade, Chrises Rock and Farley) who would leave a more sizable imprint on the landscape of American comedy. On SNL, Schneider distinguished himself with such classic characters as Richard Laymer (a.k.a. the “makin’ copies!” guy) and … well, that’s the main one.
2026-04-23 23:56:14
Welcome to Listening Habits, a column where I share the music and musical topics I’ve been fixated on recently.
The first time I ever noticed that I was being sold to by the shadowy music industry in a way that didn't feel genuine to me was with the arrival of a little superstar known as Avril Lavigne. She was the "anti-Britney." She was crass and rude and punk. She wore a white tank top and cargo pants instead of tight spandex. She had Attitude™️. It was a particularly cynical way to sell a new pop star, but these were particularly cynical times, and treating teenagers like they're dumb is an effective marketing tactic. But once I knew enough about music and the music business to pick up the signs of artificiality, I could see them everywhere: in the phony rebellion of Good Charlotte to the fake cool of Bow Wow. I didn't have a word for it when I was a kid, but I was trying to identify what became known as The Industry Plant©️.
2026-04-23 23:36:10
There are 30 Major League Baseball teams, and every summer they play a combined 2,430 games. There is baseball on every day, all the time. Someone is always hitting a ground ball into a 6-4-3 double play, or going on an eight-game losing streak, or smashing a home run deep into center field. These are all interesting things, but you will see them each a zillion times in your life. But here, Wednesday, was something new. Or rather, somewhere new for a baseball to go.
Up 5-4 against the Texas Rangers in the top of the ninth, the Pirates' Oneil Cruz came up to bat with runners on first and second. He took a strike at the top of the zone, smoothed out the dirt in the box in front of him with his foot, and calmly waited. Here came an 80 mph cutter right down the middle of the zone: a mistake or a present, depending on your perspective.
Cruz, his hands so fast and his bat so flat, twisted his body through the ball, and there it went at 116.9 mph off the bat, the hardest-hit home run of the season so far. The ball screeched into right field, looping every second a little more toward the foul line. Would it stay fair? In the box, Cruz watched the ball swerve, maybe prayed for it to stay fair. And his prayers were answered by the thinnest of margins.
2026-04-23 23:13:01
A couple of members of Defector’s Philadelphia bureau received an invitation, approximately one year ago, to attend the official launch of the city's F1 Arcade (pretty much what it sounds like), with DJ Jazzy Jeff. None of us were able to attend. Ever since then, until this very week, we have been talking about visiting, and failing to visit, the F1 Arcade. Here, in our own words, is the story of our visit.
Kathryn Xu: I suppose the most important piece of information here is that we have been meaning to go to the Formula 1 Arcade in Philly from the day it opened, and after some punting and faffing about, we finally managed to do so approximately one year later, which is a huge occasion unto itself—if just for the fact that I was so sure the F1 Arcade would fail and close before we would ever get the opportunity! Surely F1 simulator racing was not so popular in Philly that it could be a sustainable enterprise. Yet month after month passed, and the arcade lived on, and each time I happened to pass by, I would take a photo and text my beloved coworkers, "We should finally go!" And we finally did.
Kelsey McKinney: We ate dinner before at the delicious Nan Zhou Hand-Drawn Noodle House, and I ate so much beef noodle soup that my tummy felt warm. And suddenly, while I was eating I was hit with a wave of panic. Was the F1 Arcade even open still? Was it open on Tuesdays? I hadn't checked! Had anyone checked? Because we've been talking about going for so long, I took it as an inevitability that it would be ready for us whenever we wanted it. Luckily, that was in fact true.
