2026-04-13 07:32:00
Yesterday I went down a bit of a rabbit hole reading and watching videos of early synthesizer artists. Most notably, I was fascinated by the story of Wendy Carlos. I was astounded I had not bumped into her story before. She also reminded me of a lesson I try to remind myself of every now and then.
Wendy Carlos was, and still is, a pioneer in the field. She wrote the score for a number of great movies including A Clockwork Orange and TRON. She released an incredible album of Bach pieces performed on a Moog Synthesizer, Switched-On Bach. In fact, she collaborated constantly with Robert Moog in the development of his eponymous synthesizer. In essence, if you have come into contact with any kind of electronic music, it was almost certainly influenced by Carlos's work, and much of what we take for granted in that field originated with her.
She also, however, struggled against every expectation that society had at the time. She was a trans woman in the public eye in the 1960s. She bucked every musical tradition by forging her own path to self-expression. Every time it looked like she had found a niche to settle down into, she immediately jumped to something new. She was, in all ways, what she wanted to be rather than what other people wanted her to be.
Even more delightful, however, she has a website with exactly the kind of oddball personal feel that I have found so wonderfully typical of the smallweb. She posts about her experimental instruments, about solar eclipses, and about map making. Rather than pigeonhole herself into one thing, she follows her interest wherever it takes her.
I think all of us should aspire to be so unapologetically ourselves. Most of what society expects or demands of us is just plain nonsense. Forget what people expect of you and just be yourself and stop worrying about what the rest of the world expects. I need to be reminded of that every so often.
2026-04-13 06:05:00
Sonder, noun
son·der/ ˈsɒn dər /
"the realization and understanding that all other people have lives as complex as one's own"
Sonder is such an interesting word. I first read about it in some book or dictionary a few years ago. Every once in a while it pops into my head again and I spend some time to look at the people around me. It's such a fascinating thing, knowing that everyone's lives are just as—if not more—complicated as your own.
I went to the library today to get some homework done (and ended up writing this post instead lmao), and it was pretty busy, enough that it took a minute to find a spot to sit. There were all sorts of people there, from elementary age kids doing math worksheets to seniors sitting together in a half-circle all reading the same book.
A couple days ago I was at the mall, and I took the elevator all the way up to the rooftop parking for fresh air. Being up there gave me a really good view of both the street and the park across the street. Every single car and every single person walking around down below me really made me think about what kinds of lives they all must live.
How did that man with the limp injure himself? What hobbies does that woman with the floral dress have? What kinds of events have those high-schoolers been to? How long has that couple been a couple, and what are their plans for their future together?
I also love wondering what destinations cars are driving to. I assume most are going out for groceries or errands on a Sunday, but many could be coming from a vacation or a trip to visit family.
It's so much fun to pass the time with thoughts like these. Sonder is probably in my top 50 words of all time, because it really inspires me to think about the people around me more than I usually do. I hope that everyone who ends up reading this article also gives some thought to the lives of the people around them. :3
2026-04-12 22:25:00
Sparked by an excellent podcast episode, I have written up a piece on how modern visual-first algorithmic platforms are polar opposites of the predominantly text-based social networks of yore - and not only due to technological advancements, like "powerful computers with fantastic cameras in every pocket."
Edited image of an old-timey computer screen showing the word "hello" in handwritten lettering. Original image by Alexander Shatov on Unsplash.
The tl;dr:
Oh, and I have updated the Alternatives Pt. I post with one more browser and secure chat app that readers have recommended. If you haven't yet, give it a read - especially if you're on the lookout for a new (more secure, more private) email app, chat app, or browser. It can be done! You have the power! ✊🏼
This is a new section in the Technically Good newsletter. In it, we'll highlight positive developments in the space of digital rights, digital sovereignty, and privacy, to show that it's not all doom & gloom.
What people face too often is being ground down by systems, institutions, and unjust leaders who insist on creating roles where people are forced to do dehumanizing, isolated, meaningless work, while not being given the agency to make smart and empowered decisions about how the work gets done. Or worse, they’re forced to do work in service of goals that are actively harmful and destructive, and contrary to their own values, or just contrary to basic human decency. It’s not that people are unwilling to work, it is that they are working — to balance their own humanity with the crushing burdens of having to provide for themselves and their families.
What worries me isn’t smart computers—it’s stupid humans, using the crudest energy-sucking generative AI tools to make themselves dumber, debase creativity and undermine the very concept of truth itself.
instance of copied homework↩
2026-04-12 04:57:00
Orgasms are great, genuinely one of the best feelings that I think we get to have.
Generally, this is achieved through masturbation or sex, and sometimes some of us might get them in our sleep.
I believe I've woken up post-orgasm once or twice in my life, but I've had many many dreams where I get extremely close. I've had several where I orgasm in the dream but not in real life, and in a way these in-dream orgasms are better than the real-life ones. At least in-the-moment, they are. The satisfaction is short lived, though, and the pleasure soon forgotten.
I've also come extremely close to orgasm several times in my life while awake, while hands-free. Let's not count the water-jet in the pool as a kid, even though that's technically hands-free. (and boy would I like a water jet lol those were so good but also that's super gross)
But I mean just through sheer will. I can't deny the possibility that my closeness came, in part, because of some friction or pressure from the blanket on top of me or underwear I was wearing.
I'm not sure the first time I came close just through will alone, but I do remember one instance, where I was sitting in the dark with my eyes closed. I wasn't dozed, but I wasn't fully there, either. And my little guy does what he sometimes does, spontaneously growing.
And of course that comes with a heightened awareness & a great deal of sensitivity. And boy, I tried to get there without touching it, but I was like 99% of the way there and then the pressure just faded, and the opportunity was lost.
In most of these almost moments, I switch to the usual method (though in this one case, I just gave up). But it's always so disappointing when I do. I go from that peak sensitivity and excitement into a frustrated need to orgasm, and the sensitivity fades, and then I have to go faster & maybe stir up some spicy thoughts.
And I guess it's not sheer will - there's also the flexing of the member itself, which is definitely part of the equation here.
My self-pleasure has pretty much always been very porn and fantasy heavy (depending on the day). But there are rare occasions, where I'm just present in my body. There's nothing, really, in my head. These are some of the best experiences, because I feel everything, much more thoroughly, and I'm not in a rush, I'm just enjoying the moment.
I'd like more of those moments - where it's just purely me with myself - no porn or fantasies with hotties. When I'm really in-tune with myself, there's the internal flexing too. It ceases to be just an activity of rubbing, and becomes something deeper - like I can feel the pressure inside my anus, even though I've put nothing inside my anus. (though sometimes I do and if you're a man, I suggest trying it, with plenty lube. It takes practice.)
It's odd to me that fantasy plays such a large role in something that seems to be a physical phenomena. But so too can you influence your body temperature through your thoughts - stir up some angry thoughts and you might notice yourself getting warmer. And sad thoughts can conjure up tears.
And perhaps if I want to get to the sheer-will-orgasm (I really want to get there), practicing the present-with-myself-orgasm is a good first step.
I also think meditation is part of it. Getting more in-tune with my mind & my body. Learning how to be less in-my-head and more in-the-moment. And, though this is generally not talked about in discussions of meditation, I believe it's a path to greater control over processes that are typically automatic or unintentional.
I don't see any reason why I can't have a sheer-will orgasm. It hasn't happened yet, but it's fun to try so why not go for it?
2026-04-12 02:37:00
Heya! I just saw this post from Jacob Varney about adding alt text to your stuff.
And, while I agree with the notion of doing that, the method he shows is sadly also wrong, and won't meaningfully improve your sites accessibility.
In markdown, to add alt text to your images, you do this:
The syntax Jacob showed is actually for adding title text, which is intended to show when hovering over an image, not for accessible image descriptions. Depending on the screenreader, it might not be read at all.
I've already emailed Jacob, but i figured I'd make a seperate post about this as well, to make sure noone is under the illusion that their images are accessible when they actually aren't.
update: if you want to give feedback/check the status of bears current lack of documentation on alt text, you can check out this github issue
2026-04-11 17:04:00
So, it's a day after my colonoscopy (yes, I had to do the truly awful diet and prep, and I was up all night) and I'm still tired. Still, I now feel better than I did when hearing my heart beat all too fast under the glare of hospital lights!
As is usual since signing up for Bear Blog, I was browsing through my RSS feed and found a totally unexpected post from a most kind person at the Field Notes blog. They posted some very generous (too generous, really) words about the photo-related blog I have at Pika.
This made me think about three things ~ firstly, that I need to email this most kind person and thank them (I owe them an email anyway, but the past several days have been me fighting a very bland diet and dealing with a hospital visit); secondly, that I have a feeling we have a number of things in common; and thirdly, that Bear Blog has so far given me good feels around digital community and what has been truly lacking in the mainstream web universe of big social media, where an easy Like substitutes for authentic conversation.
Genuine online communication is what I've been missing.
Reply by email: [email protected]. Subscribe to my blog via RSS feed. All words and photos by me - a human. Not by ai.