2026-01-13 07:21:00
This is for my bear blog brethren with jobs that put them above the poverty line only. Us povvos (Australian slang) do this kinda stuff anyway, and either way don't always get the choice of what we need to spend money on in the same way. (That said, you do you, if you wanna join, join.)
The challenge:
For three months, buy everything non perishable second hand. Where possible, repair things instead of buying things. Where possible, make things instead of buying things. Triple points for scavenging. Post about your journey here. Email me at [email protected] if you like so I can follow people's journeys and make my own posts about what people are doing.
This also gives me an excuse to body double with people on here and share some of my scavenged finds / creations.
It's not really a competition, but maybe we do some side quests for shits and giggles.
Quest ragweird: Make an item of clothing from scratch out of rags / other clothes.
Quest junkist: Make an object that has practical utility out of 70+ percent stuff you've scavenged for free.
Quest LGR: Find a video game at an op shop (thrift shop?) and play it to completion.
Quest Stallman: Make a useful software utility and release it under the GPL or something else compatible with community driven software.
Quest Mudlark: Find something cool on the ground and talk about it.
Quest Rossman: Show and tell something you've repaired or had repaired.
Quest Höch: Find old print media / cheap canvases with generic art already on them. Turn them into something new.
Quest Evil Höch: Find some AI art someone else has generated online. Turn it into your own collage/pastiche/manual re-interpretation. It's public domain. It's collage. No one can stop you.
Quest (ab)Normal Artist: Make any kind of creative work, but it has to be something that makes you uncomfortable in some way and you have to explain why. Bonus points if it would also make your peer group uncomfortable.
Quest Pay it Forward: If you normally buy new things and save money by not doing so, donate that money to mutual aid or some kinda reputable charity that supports people who need it.
Email me if you do any of these quests and I'll make a post about them if/when I get a few. You can obviously do the quests even if you can't avoid buying new stuff. Maybe it'll be a gateway drug, or just some non-commercial fun.
2026-01-13 04:39:00
Visibility is not value. It’s exposure. And those are not the same.
Talent or skill being invisible doesn’t make it useless it just means it hasn’t been seen yet. Stuff you create in private; that’s not useless because it hasn’t gone viral or it's in a shoe box under your bed. It’s still valuable to you, to the people directly around you, or to someone who finds it later if you choose to share it.
Virality is temporary, anyway. It doesn't mean it will stick long-term, we’ve all seen how volatile trends are, and it doesn't mean it suddenly has value because of the engagement is has or the sales that it made.
If talent only mattered once it was seen or sold, then everything created in private would be meaningless. Every sketchbook never shared. Every draft never published. Every song or poem written for no one but the person making it. Every skill practiced quietly, imperfectly, and with an audience of only one.
Value should always come from yourself first.
A lot of this mindset comes from confusing external validation with intrinsic value. Social media platforms have trained us to think that if something doesn’t perform then it ultimately failed. If it didn’t get clicks and views, likes or upvotes, or take off and go viral for a day, it was a waste of time. But that logic only works if your sole goal is visibility and nothing else; not learning, not expression, not enjoyment, and not deeper meaning or self exploration.
Creating something changes you whether anyone sees it or not. You don’t walk away empty-handed just because an algorithm didn’t pick you.
Some things are worth doing simply because you feel alive while you’re doing them.
2026-01-13 01:39:00
“You could be the best in the world at what you do. Doesn't matter. If nobody knows you exist, you're invisible. And invisible people don't get opportunities, don't get clients, don't get recognition, and don't get paid what they're worth.”
I saw a tweet that said this and it’s become very evident in my life.
From business to personal life it’s signs are there.
If you don’t have “clout” or an “audience” very soon, you will not exist.
There are people doing less than you who are still getting ahead of you.
They’re landing all the big jobs & clients.
Not because they’re better, but because they’re visible.
I recently wanted to buy someone flowers. I usually go to the local florist near where I live but this time I decided to look on Instagram.
I found a lot of pages of cool florists.
One stood out to me.
She’s 21, full-time shift manager at McDonald’s, passionate about flowers and the meaning behind them.
Her work was the best work I’ve seen in a long time… she only had about 200 followers.
She’s been trying to make this her full-time thing, but it’s not working out for her.
I still ordered from her and her service was 10/10
I say this to say…
Good work only matters if people see it.
If you want opportunities, you have to make yourself known.
You can keep working in silence, or you can start building a reputation that opens doors.
Both are choices.
2026-01-13 00:05:00
"I hope you live a life you're proud of, and if you find you're not, I hope you have the strength to start over again."
F. Scott Fitzgerald
I left my job in October of last year. I quit because I hated it. I have been unemployed for the past 3+ months.
The original plan was to spend my time upskilling and building a portfolio so I could get an offer for a "better" job. I have not been doing that. I've been having a hard time finding many employers I'm interested in working for, plus any roles that I think would be more fulfilling.
I know the job market is considered to be pretty poor right now and I'm guessing there are some people out there who share my feelings. I worry about the long term effects of so many young people struggling to build a career and potentially losing trust in the system. I'm actually quite surprised by everyone who still feels inspired enough to go to work every day. But maybe that stems from the need to pay rent rather than any sort of devotion to managers or employers.
I've become a bit cynical about work. I know I'm not alone in that sentiment, actually that's probably the majority opinion. I'm having a really difficult time motivating myself to get back in the workforce. I've had enough money saved up to get me this far. I will probably only go back when that money runs out.
I've decided that when I do go back to work, I'll look for something lower paying with low commitment. I would rather live a humble life on my own terms than a lavish life on someone else's.
2026-01-12 20:15:00
What I imagined would take days turned into weeks, and now into months.
It’s about moving blog posts and other content into this “new” blog of mine. Once again, I’m sorry if this messes up your feed reader. I hope to be done tomorrow, at least with the major part of it all.
I don’t know how many times I’ve felt like giving up. In fact, I have given up several times, and not only when it comes to moving content.
I have given up…
The list goes on and on. Nevertheless, all those things are still part of my life. I have given up, but not given in.
It’s okay to give up. It’s good to give up.
Giving up is the power-boost version of pausing. Pausing is haunting and daunting, always lurking in the background, reminding you of things to come.
It’s never too late to give up. And start again.
2026-01-12 19:11:00
On the evening of the 11th day of January 2026, I tried to kill myself. A simple affair, after hours of laying in bed listening to different albums by various artists on the bleakness of reality. I think I meant for it to be a casual thing to try out - just gonna see if this works out or not. Of course, such a deeply consequential act could never be considered a casual thing. You either attempt, or you don't. And in this case, I did attempt, no matter what levity I could paint over it all. A suicide by hanging, with my own belt, in my pigsty of a bedroom at 8 PM.
Of course, I'm here instead, typing this out at 3 AM after removing the belt from around my neck and opening up my laptop to hyperfixate on recreating my old website that I'd lost the source code to. I thought, well why not? Might as well wax poetic about it if I'm not going to finish what I started.
I was, in the middle of preparing a way to dangle, interrupted by a text from a dear friend. I won't name who, but you really did save my life just then. Prior to this chain of events, I had reached out to them in a last-ditch effort to find company in anyone other than myself. They weren't around physically, but did get back to me and we had a brief text exchange. I suppose my usual sense of whimsy wasn't conveyed in this exchange, as they asked me if I was okay and how my weekend was.
I had no qualms about being honest about where I was at. After all, the last thing I would want if it ended up happening was for my final messages to be pored over for every inconsistency, every "what-if". If I were to take my own life, it'll at least be authentic to how I portrayed myself to the world.
Back to the present. I'm interrupted by a text, and from then on they go on to ask if I would like to call. Nothing better to do. I spend the next 40 minutes being consoled with words of affirmation and distraction, interspersed with my sniffles and sobs.
I won't lie and say that I was then absolved of my months-long depressive episode in an epiphany to wander across state lines spreading cheer and gospel (not that I would want to do such a thing even outside of my depression). But it did create a break in that loop that kept repeating in my head, over and over again.
I'm tired -> Everything hurts -> Make it stop by any means necessary.
And sometimes, maybe that's enough to save somebody from doing something that they'd absolutely regret.
As I write this, my body is wracked with all sorts of uncomfortable sensations of being alive - flashes of hunger pangs, the urge to pee, a dryness accompanied with a cough I'd developed over an illness I'd contracted on New Year's Eve, the overwhelming hot air blasting from a vent next to my bed. But most importantly, I am alive.
One step at a time, I guess.
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