2025-06-07 19:38:00
A few months before I got married, I spoke to a family friend. He’d been around the block and shared a reflection about marriage and careers.
He shared that the effect he’d seen was fascinating as it was binary more often than not.
After marriage, strong performers either became superstars or went through a severe regression in their performance.
In effect, 1+1 was either much greater than 2 or it was..0.
I’ve thought about that reflection over the years – in marriages and in teams.
Strong teams are generally a sum of their parts. The complementary skill sets come together to make them great.
And, in most other cases, you can’t help get the feeling that the team’s performance is less than the sum of its parts.
All in all, a useful rule of thumb. Teams/partnerships either work great… or not.
There’s rarely middle ground.
2025-06-06 19:48:00
“If come from inside you, always the right one” | Mr. Miyagi, referring to decisions that come from listening to ourselves.
The quieter we become, the more we’re able to listen to the answers that emerge within.
2025-06-05 19:33:00
I work on the jobs marketplace and the jobseeker experience on LinkedIn.
In a labor market like the one today, there’s definitely a lot of frustration flying around.
There’s no doubt we have a lot of work to do and a responsibility to our users to make things better. And, given my role, I’m at the receiving end of some of that feedback and frustration.
Every once a while, I get thoughtful and considerate feedback. It is so lovely when people do that.
Often, though, they’re worded in a way that is intended to hurt.
I’ve learnt two lessons over time –
(1) Remove the emotion and answer the question/comment. When I first received these notes, I used to feel the emotion surge as I tried to keep my cool. I’ve gotten better at removing the emotion. It isn’t personal and it is sometimes easy to lose that perspective.
I do my best to help outline the challenges (especially with requests that aren’t realistic) and set expectations. And, of course, if it is offensive, I remind myself that I can choose not to respond.
(2) The feedback is a privilege. I would have given a lot a few years ago to get to work on a problem like this. The feedback is just a reminder of the work that lies ahead to make things better.
That again is a reminder to remove the emotion, acknowledge the privilege, and just try to be of help.
It is, of course, a lesson that is relevant in other scenarios as well. It is good to be able to remove the emotion and just answer the question.
I hope to get better at doing so over time.
2025-06-04 19:09:00
When you learn to play the guitar, you know to expect multiple cuts and calluses in your fingers.
Lifting weights, on the other hand, means dealing with soreness.
Public speaking means learning to deal with stage fright.
Pain in the learning process is required to help our bodies and minds adapt to new challenges.
Many say they want to accelerate their learning curve. The real question is if they’re willing to lean into the inevitable pain that comes with that.
2025-06-03 19:23:00
If you’re expecting every person you work with to agree with your decisions or to like you along the way, it is highly likely you won’t get much done.
This doesn’t mean you can get away being a jerk for long. There’s a balance – too often though, we get caught up in our desire for affiliation. It is nice to be liked.
But that’s not the job.
The job is about getting the important things done. Ideally in a way that brings the people that matter along for the most part.
That in turn often means choosing to be the kind of person who is respected for sound judgment.
Everything else is gravy in the long run.
2025-06-02 19:03:00
A decade ago, I made it a point to read 2 books per month. I was curious about many topics and I’m glad I indulged my curiosity in that phase.
In this current phase, I am reading significantly fewer books but I’m spending more time attempting to change my habits based on the books I read.
2025 might just go down as the year when I attempted to change my life based on what I learnt from “Good Energy,” “Built to Move,” and “Outlive.”
If I manage to do that, it’ll go down as a successful year. If I don’t, I’ll plan to read them again and try again in 2026.
Changing our measure of success changes our approach.
